Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
he was CRYING into my vagina
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Randomize
