I am in a vortex of obligation.
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Randomize
