Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Randomize