What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Randomize
