I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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