honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
