Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Blood and glitter go together right?
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
Randomize
