Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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