Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Even my vagina gasped.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
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