awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
