i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
Randomize