i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
