I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
