U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
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