So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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