I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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