are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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