i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
