sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
