u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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