This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
