susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
