If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize
