Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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