On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize
