I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
