so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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