So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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