Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
