in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
Randomize
