you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
