Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Randomize
