He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
I'm just crazy horny about you
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
