He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
