Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
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