pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Randomize
