You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
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