We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I need a beard to bite.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
Randomize
