the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize
