Sponge bath it is.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize