My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
