i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Randomize
