We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
Randomize