We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
