his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize
