Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
