Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Randomize
