ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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