I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Randomize
