Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
