Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Randomize
